New York Lawyer
September 7, 2006

Q:
I am an experienced senior associate who will soon start working closely with a new associate who has far less experience but who is much older than I am. I've met the new associate and he seems fine, very friendly and smart, however I'm concerned about how I am going to handle supervisory issues. This is a second career for him, and prior to this time he held very responsible positions in another industry. We actually discussed this during the interview process, and he said convincingly that he didn't mind the prospect of being supervised by younger people, but I'm still worried. Do you have any suggestions for dealing with this issue?

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A:

This is an increasingly common feature in workplaces today, even in legal settings. It sets up some possibilities of generational clashes, as the Boomers face off against the X-ers, Y-ers and Millenials. A lot of what drives problems when younger bosses supervise older folks is fear, on both sides. The young one fears that the older one looks down o n her for her lack of experience, and anyway has no business bossing him around; the older one fears he will be overlooked as "over the hill," and probably does have some issues around being told what to do by someone his daughter's age.

It's easy to dream up all kinds of problems in advance, but there are plenty of techniques you can take advantage of to turn this supposed dilemma into a major help for you.

Make sure not to stereotype and prejudge. It is easy to have expectations about an older "new" lawyer. However, just because he's older does not mean that he doesn't "get" things, that he's a stick-in-the-mud, that he can't work a computer, that he hates all change (demonstrably untrue as he's gone through the trouble of starting a second career), that he thinks all Gen-Xers are slackers, etc. Be careful not to prejudge, and certainly be careful not to make remarks that suggest that you have certain preconceptions based on his age ("about time to retire, isn't it?"), and that can get the firm into legal trouble to boot.

Take advantage of his broader knowledge. Just because he was in a different industry doesn't mean that that experience isn't useful. There are many dimensions to success that aren't available in law books; perhaps he can provide help and insight on management issues, dealing with clients, thinking strategically, or with marketing. In particular, remember that if he worked in another industry, very likely he is used to more advanced management methods than are generally practiced in law firms and can be a resource in that regard.

Set clear expectations. This is a good thing to do with anyone you're working with, but perhaps a little more so with someone who is much older than you are. It allows you to make clear what is expected so that there are fewer misunderstandings; he can ask questions to clarify those expectations; together you can set goals and deadlines.

Get some quick runs on the board. Figure out some immediate tasks to work on together with a short timeline that will establish a good working relationship. There's nothing like success in a work project to overcome initial insecurities.

Respect all around is key. This is crucial. Mutual respect drives positive working relationships; a lack thereof kills them. If you treat him with respect, and he in turn treats you properly, you will be far more likely to succeed than to fail. If you sense that he is not being respectful in his attitude toward you (for example, loftily dismissing your direction and suggesting that he knows better as a result of his greater wisdom), that you can and must discuss that dynamic with him. He doesn't need to kowtow to you, but he must be respectful.

Keep lines of communication open. Another big killer in relationships of any sort is silence -- silence that morphs into resentment, fuming, false assumptions and other unproductive activities. It is vital to keep talking. That will be more up to you than him, as you hold more power than he does. Therefore, schedule regular times to talk; make appointments to follow up on issues; and talk more face-to-face than by email or phone at the beginning.

Handle critical feedback carefully. There may come a time where you have to let him know that he hasn't done a good job. Follow all the rules for good giving of feedback (be factual, not conclusory; emphasize your partnership as a team, rather than acting like a dictator) but be extra sensitive in this case so that you don't jeopardize your relationship.

Try these approaches. If your attitude is open and nonjudgmental, you have a good chance of transforming a possible problem into a thriving and productive relationship

Sincerely,
Holly English
Principal Consultant, Values at Work