New York Lawyer
March 23, 2006

Q:
One of our partners is such a blowhard. He dominates meetings, talks on and on, and just drives us crazy. Anything we can do?

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A:

Such people can drive you crazy. Not only are they annoying, but also their domination of conversations and meetings means that other people don't get to weigh in, resulting in a lopsided view where the blowhard has a disproportionate influence. There are some things to do:

Talk to others and get organized. You can have a plan of action when he starts to take over to short circuit his rants. One comment would be, "Let's hear from other people," to indicate that he's gone on long enough and that you need to get a variety of comments. You can arrange with others to second such a comment so that you are more likely to derail him.

Forget politeness. Often such people have a thick hide. You must speak to them very directly and loudly to them to get their attention. Politeness and restraint doesn't work. You will often find that sticking it to such a person directly will have surprisingly effective results.

Have a private talk. Enlist someone with a good relationship with the guy and have a talk with him about his effectiveness in the firm. Often such people have no idea how they come across nor how they affect others. The person can point out that he would be more effective, and his colleagues would listen to him and take him seriously, if he edited his remarks and was more thoughtful in his delivery.

Run tighter meetings. Whoever is running meetings should set time limits on how long each item will be discussed, and - as chair of the meeting - exercise his/her authority to limit individual participants' comments as well.

Suggest a coach. If you really feel that this guy's habits are hurting himself and others, suggest that he hire an executive coach. An excellent coach can make a world of difference in helping a person revamp his strategies and approaches so that he is ultimately more successful.

Try a few of these and see if the insanity factor doesn't decrease a bit.

Sincerely,
Holly English
Principal Consultant, Values at Work