New York Lawyer
May 26, 2005

Q:
I have been working at the same small-firm plaintiff's PI job since the bar exam last August and after nearly 9 months, I have yet to receive one bit of praise. Rather, my very cold boss has consistently spoken down to me, calling me a "disappointment" and told me that I am "apparently unable to learn" since all my hard work leaves me flat on my face in his eyes.

I was admitted in February and received a very small raise as was promised when I was hired, although I still make under $40k (in NYC!). I'm miserable and this cold-hearted bully of a partner is driving every ounce of motivation from me by the day.

I love the kind of work I do, and really do believe I made a correct career choice, but how can I ever move on (and up, I hope) when the word "stupid" has been used to describe me by the one man with whom I work closely on a regular basis? As a side note, I was told a few months ago that he "has a hard time" with the fact that I am only a few years older than his daughter. He admitted this was "his" problem, but has done nothing to modify the unconstructive nature of his general and nasty criticism. I work very hard, but my heart isn't in it now, and I blame him completely. I'm scared to go out and find another job since I'm not here a year and don't know how I could get a reference. I feel trapped and as if I'm being postured for no raise and no future, although he makes reference to things for me to do "in six months" while here (i.e.: I'm not getting fired).

We have no review system in place, but I need a raise because I can't live on my meager salary and feel beat up daily by his hurtful criticism. I don�t even know how to approach the partner who hates me to ask without him tossing me out of here. I need a job, but I can�t keep going on this path. There isn�t anyone to speak to and he doesn�t seem to treat anyone else here so poorly. Please help. Can I talk to him? Should I just leave and take my chances? Will I ever be hirable again?

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A:

Your game plan needs to be to get out of there, absent a miraculous change in firm environment, once your first year is up. Your story will be that you simply need to make more money, period.

I say this because your account of your workplace says to me that it is not worth trying to rectify the problems. You have a boss who�s nasty, talks down to you, tries to make you feel bad, openly admits he has a "problem" with you due to your young age (an obviously discriminatory remark), and pays you peanuts. I�m not seeing where you owe him a second chance.

I don�t see anything in your question that suggests talking to this attorney will get you anywhere. If you did tell him your discomfort, my bet is that he will continue to lie (promising that things will get better), or will become enraged. Either way, you won�t get what you want.

It�s great that you still feel you are in the right field. Often when people in their first law job have a miserable boss, they generalize the experience to the entire profession. There are plenty of humane lawyers out there, so search them out and leave this slimeball behind.

By the way, when you are looking, don�t tell the outside world about all the political problems you experienced. Say that you learned a lot but that the money situation simply wasn�t sufficient, and that you need to make more. You don�t want people to wonder whether you were the problem, so don�t give them the opportunity.

Sincerely,
Holly English