New York Lawyer
October 3, 2002

Q:
Our managing partner is the most powerful alpha person in the office. Some people, especially younger lawyers, are drawn in by his outgoing, charismatic manner and think he�s their best friend. They tell him things that they shouldn�t.

It comes back to haunt them. The younger people think they�re buddies with him, but they�re not. They na�vely tell him their take on what�s going on in the office or the latest gossip, and he holds it against them later.

How do I, another partner, warn people about this without being disloyal to the managing partner or getting myself in trouble?

Submit Your Question

Find More Answers

A:

Anyone in a position of responsibility, but especially the managing partner in a firm, has a special duty to those they are managing. He or she sets the tone for the office, models what behaviors are acceptable around the firm, and should conduct himself or herself very much as the leader. As such the way the managing partner acts is in the spotlight, with even small, seemingly insignificant moves scrutinized by others.

Therefore, a breach of confidence on a routine basis such as you are talking about is particularly objectionable. You�re right to be put off by this behavior. He�s in a position that should inspire respect and trust, and shouldn�t be tucking away embarrassing bits of information to spring on people later, especially those who are junior to him. To do so at the top poisons the well. It suggests that basic trust is in short supply, and that politics rules the day.

Your options are limited. You can�t warn people in advance about the untrustworthy managing partner because that would look odd or like sour grapes, as well as disloyal. If someone comes to you after a bad experience, you can caution them -- without commenting directly on your partner -- that sharing personal or sensitive information with people you don�t know well is not advisable in an office setting until you fully trust them, after a long period of time.

You could sit down with the managing partner and share your concerns, but this seems unlikely, given your concern about getting yourself in trouble; it sounds like you are not close enough to him to deliver the word. You could ask someone who�s closer to him to handle it.

More broadly, you can start a conversation at the partnership level relating to confidentiality about private matters and handling people�s confidences sensitively. Even more generally, you can start a conversation about basic trust, including the responsibilities senior people have when they mentor junior people, and the pitfalls these relationships might have. In this way you can raise the subject and give it a thorough airing without unduly confronting the managing partner.

Sincerely,
Holly English
Principal Consultant, Values at Work