New York Lawyer
June 14, 2001

Q:
Periodically at our partner meetings, one partner has launched a surprise attack on me about one of my cases, my hours, etc. Usually it�s in a throwaway comment, as if he�s just casually mentioning it (like �of course your hours were down last month� or �boy, that case was a real dog.�).

These comments usually are unmerited or there�s a good explanation for what�s going on, but I feel sort of ridiculous trying to explain myself. And by the time I think of something to say often he�s moved on to something else. I don�t notice him doing this to others, and I�m worried that he can do some real damage to me if I don�t figure out how to deal with him.

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A:
This guy specializes in �snakebites�: surprise attacks that come and go so quickly you don�t know what hit you. They�re hard to respond to effectively because you have no advance warning and because, as you point out, you risk appearing defensive if you respond directly.

You need to ask yourself a few questions before trying to deal with this. First, are you sure he�s got it in for you alone? Ask around a little bit to see if others also don�t trust him. If this is his general M.O., I�d leave it alone, figuring others will generally see it for what it is � pure politics with no sincere intention of helping the firm.

If you�re satisfied that he�s gunning for you, for whatever reason, you can do a number of things. I�d put direct confrontation at the end of my list. Such people often hide behind total innocence if confronted, and are very pleased to find out that you�re bothered by their stealth approach.

If his comments represent a serious attack on your credibility, I�d be prepared with a calm response line that doesn�t scream paranoia. Something like, �Just to avoid any misunderstanding here, my hours were down last month due to extraordinary hours spent dealing with hiring.�

The �avoiding a misunderstanding� phrase is a nice one because it doesn�t directly oppose the speaker, or announce that you disagree or are in conflict, but instead suggests that you�re simply trying to help him and others out by giving them all the facts. A general air of helpfulness, or regret at the speaker�s lack of information (�I�m sorry to say that Jim doesn�t seem to know all the facts about the Smith case�), can be a useful weapon in combating these slimy tactics. Let�s hope he gets the message and slithers away.

Sincerely,
Holly English
Principal Consultant, Values at Work